Coffee Date and a little #AtoZChallenge: R

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This little guy is going to be an apple someday.
If the weather keeps cooperating.

Friday, you’re late! No, not really, but I missed you so it feels like it. I had a real hankering for chocolate donut coffee today so I stopped at Target on the way into work to pick some up. They had 14 different kinds of vanilla and hazelnut, but didn’t have any chocolate. I wasn’t going to spend $12 on the mocha flavored box so I went to find chocolate syrup.

I found hot fudge first. I’m not disappointed at all.

So how are you? What’s in your cup? Did you make it through Lent and Passover? (If you observe either.) I got a lot of what I wanted to get done for Lent accomplished, but not the running. I made my hamstring angry again (up where it connects to my sit bone) so running was off the table. It did make it possible to finish more projects, write more letters, and clean out some clothing though. Next year’s tax return is growing!

(I did abstain from peanut butter, peanut sauce, and peanut butter chocolate candy for the entire duration of Lent. High five! I’ve also opened a new jar at my desk this week.)

I’m hoping to tackle some more projects this weekend. Crap weather and few plans? While napping sounds excellent, I can do a few projects around the house. Speaking of projects, I was lamenting to BatGirl yesterday that home improvement stores need a “buy this room/project” button. I was looking at some bathrooms for the “refresh” and man, digging through the site to find the individual items is for chumps.

I managed to find items I wanted though, so that’s cool. Now to just figure out a time to tear apart the bathroom to redo it! I was feeling bold yesterday and thought, why not? I have a free weekend! It’s supposed to be crappy! Let’s do it!

Today I’m feeling much less daring. There’s plumbing involved after all…Electrical stuff, okay, but I’m not all about plumbing – yet. It might be something I regret.

Speaking of, how about today’s ‘ku?

r is for regrets
but don’t think have any
maybe retrospect

a few things i’d change
maybe? but not things i did
many choices made

some i’d make again
even questionable ones
but don’t laugh at that!

everything taught me
something i needed to learn
sometimes more than once

late nights we spent out
bonding, making memories,
new friends and foes too

add to who i am
and what i bring to the world
i can’t give that back

The closest thing to a regret I have is considering going back to DJZ after how horrible he was to me. (But you know what? I learned a lot from that.) I might regret being gunho about a bathroom redo too, but I bet I’d learn a lot from it!

Do you have any regrets?

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#AtoZChallenge: Q

so q is for “quoi?”
as in a je ne sais quoi
all my faves have it

unnamed quality
draws us to us to one another
it’s “i don’t know what”

“thing” you can’t describe
more of a feeling  you get
maybe chemistry?

mehmere used to say
it was how she found her friends
they had “it”, but what?

doesn’t matter what
find it, embrace it, hold tight
they are your people

i can pinpoint some
qualities my friends all share
and mostly all good!

kindness, brains, and heart
humor, beauty, hard workers
snark, spitfire, and sass

but every last one
has magically pulled me in
with je ne sai quoi

See other #AtoZChallenge here

 

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#AtoZChallenge: P

peterpan

The Bro and I joke that’s how you get to our hometown.

p is for peter
as in peter, peter pan
who never grew up

stories of lost boys
wendy, hook, tinkerbelle too
and their adventures

he’s one of my faves
have a soft spot for lost boys
i’m not quite wendy…

don’t want to mother
but be their friend, safe space, love
but not quite tink

love adventure
mischievous, with spunk and sass
bring on the challenge

anyway, i’ve been
reading the book if can’t sleep
see friends in pages

have you read the book?
if not, do you know the tales?
from book, who are you?

See other #AtoZChallenge here

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#AtoZChallenge: O

2017-04-18_04-11-51o is for once, right?
perhaps once upon a time
was a certain way

but the story changed;
it isn’t so any more
which one was better?

or was it just so
and it is not anymore?
this is what is now

or could be only
this is how it is for now
and it will improve

is unknown right now
just know i’m looking at
different o, options

See other #AtoZChallenge here

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#AtoZChallenge: N

16649139_10102627235041872_6435829284774926720_nn is for nanny
sunday marked three years she’s gone
if you count easters

i miss her dearly
her humor, spunk, fight and strength
read more about her

i love you nanny
thank you for beautiful day
with a rainbow end

See other #AtoZChallenge here

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#AtoZChallenge M

m is for maybe
could be yes, but could be no
just feels like limbo

it’s one of my least
favorite words, but one used
maybe too often

little bits limbo?
they’re okay and expected
big things it’s not good

then theres bigger things
do i stay or do I go?
is it yes or no?

maybes there are hard
can accept any answers
or learn to do so

but i have to know
so i can make up my mind
and not say maybe

See other #AtoZChallenge here

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#AtoZChallenge A-L

Fotor_149038720673227i was supposed to
join an april blog challenge
it seems i didn’t

so to play catch up
i’ll write a haiku each day
today you get twelve

i hope coach daddy
appreciates my effort
catch up to the game

***

a is for about
about me, or about you?
alright, i’ll go first

i’m me: sassy, bold
kindhearted, smart-assed, loving
creative, works hard

liberally minded
but i’ll listen to your views
unless you’re a jerk

now your turn to tell
something random about you
doesn’t matter what!

***

b is for baking
it’s something i love dearly
soothes my troubled soul

isn’t a “food” blog
more “whatever i want” blog
focus? not my thing

***

c is for courtney
or if you’re a friend? court’s fine
only those real close

get to use nicknames
but those who get to use them?
know just what they are

***

d’s for delurking
i invite you to delurk
with this one, say hi!

guilty of it, too
i’ll be sure make a point
to say hi to you!

***

e is for enough
it’s something i struggle with
being and doing

i am good enough
do enough, try hard enough
and i should know this

but often i feel
like i sure don’t measure up
i’m working on it

***

f is for frisky
what? you never feel that way?
embrace it, own it

i try to keep it
pg round here, but sometimes
owning it might show

have no fear though mom
there will be a disclaimer
if i’m going there

***

g is for my girls
sounds trite, this i know for sure
but i have the best

crew we’ve created
and i surround myself with
amazing humans

kind, loyal, funny
beautiful hearts, souls, and minds
nice butts all of them

i’m the luckiest
because they all have my back
in good times and bad

if the reflection
of me is seen in my friends
i’m doin’ okay

***

h is for help, oh?
as in me asking for it
i’m not good at that

i’m working on it
getting better at asking
for help when needed

***

i is for inkling
psychic bubble if you will
my gut knows a lot

don’t always listen
but when it says something clearly
often wish i had

***

j is for joking
love a good sense of humor
laughs? key to my heart

but not just jokes though
wit, quips, sarcasm, kid, bawdy
it all works for me

***

k is for kindness
choosing to be kind
not always easy

but it’s always right
it might not look like you think
might be hard to do

better in the end
treat everyone with kindness
and respect in life

***

l is for love, yes
love exists in many forms
friendship, romantic

somewhere in between
lucky to experience
love in many forms

started my own day
celebrate when/as you will
it’s talentod’s day!

***

phew that was a lot
of haikus to write for you
now write one for me?

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Checking in and some things I’d forgotten…

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Birthday wishes.
Thanks for the cake and candles Daddy-O

Well then, it’s been a hot minute hasn’t it? What can I say? I’ve been distracted and all over the place. The less kids in the pool I mentioned before came with a whole lot of drama to deal with resulting in more hours at the pool, late night phone calls, meetings, emails flying, and a lot of UGH.

I’ve been finalizing a huge presentation and traveling for work to deliver it which took me to Ithaca and Buffalo so far…(Ithaca didn’t go as well as planned due to factors outside of my control but ones I can mitigate not to let happen again) and then a baby shower and the next day back to Buffalo for a bridal shower.

When I ended up with a stomach bug this week, I wasn’t exactly surprised.  Not happy at all, but not surprised.

What I am a little surprised by is how I’d forgotten just how much I love Ithaca, how much I don’t like solo road trips, how the right pair of jeans can be ego boosting, and how ending a crazy stretch of days with a fire under the stars lets you take a deep breath and just be.

I’d forgotten what it feels like to sit down with a friend of 20+ years that you haven’t seen a whole lot of in the last 10 and literally pick up right where you left off in both depth of conversation and height of laughter. It had been far too long, but his voice and his hug were both familiar and comfortable around me. In a weird way, it was sort of the perfect way to spend a birthday I wasn’t excited to have.

I’d forgotten what it was like to get not so great reviews on a presentation and have to take matters into your own hands so it didn’t happen again. It’s been a long time and I can do better, damn it.

I’d forgotten what it feels like to be the driver in a 4+ hour each way road trip and how I was seriously considering hiring a driver for the next time or taking the train because I feel like driving is a waste of time I could be doing other stuff. If I hadn’t finished my “due” projects in the days before this trip it would have made me seriously antsy.

And I won’t forget how the stranger who liked what he saw in those jeans? His words and the way he looked at me will stay with me. Thank you random person.

What have you unexpectedly been reminded of lately?

No, I don’t put all that much stock in strangers opinions of me, but when someone makes it a point to go out of their way to say something very flattering on a day I’m struggling with how I look and feel about myself physically? It sticks with me. It was also came with a look that was very reminiscent of a look LN would given me, so I have to wonder if he had a hand in it.

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Coffee date

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Sometimes you have to laugh because the alternative is to just cry.
Coffee had just come out of my nose.

Hi there, thanks for joining me for a cup of coffee today. I love what you’ve done with your hair. What’s in your cup?

Lately, I’ve been on a cinnamon coffee kick which is convenient because it’s one of the options in the 20 or so coffees my office has stocked. There were extra options though this morning and I couldn’t decide if I should make myself Vanilla Biscotti or Wild Blueberry. My decision was made when I saw the Glazed Chocolate Donut on the shelf.

Sold. I’m not regretting it. Or the second cup.

How’s your week been? I think mine can be summed up by “shit-show”, but I don’t really want to get into it. It’s been exhausting.

I’m fine. To the best of my knowledge my friends and family are alright. Office job is okay. Pool is still filled with water. Less kids though.

Anything new and exciting to report? I’m a little jealous that some of my friends are traveling right now. One friend’s fb feed was filled with pictures of Iceland, another is in Barcelona. Mom is sending me pics from FL of my brother and nephew. (He’s still super cute in case you’re wondering. My nephew, not my brother.)

I was going to go to FL myself, but was told it wasn’t convenient for the office and I couldn’t have the time off in the time frame I asked about. Do you have any fun trips planned? Right now I’m going to have to stick to my trips to Neverland while I read Peter Pan…

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Thursday Three – Things I still do today (but for different reasons) that I did in my younger days…

smiptempJPGLast night after a couple of hours at the pool I headed home, excited to have leftover Chipotle for dinner. I was a little grumpy when I realized that I hadn’t put gas in my car as I intended to do during the day. I meant to go out at lunch, but then didn’t take a lunch. Sigh.

I was also grumpy with myself for not remembering to take pants with me that I could put on after the pool.

After I put about $10 in my car, I hopped back into my seat and smiled. There was a day $10 was a necessity, not a choice. In my 20 min or so drive back to my place, I thought about how different life was now and that got me thinking about the things I still did the same sometimes, but for very different reasons.

  1. Put a small amount of gas in my car. How much gas I put in my car often used to be tied to how much money I had in my account at that time. Not that I have a lot of money now, but I usually don’t have to think about how much is in my account to put gas in my car, for which I’m thankful! Now I’m more likely to consider how cold it is and how long I can stand being outside.
  2. Eat a bowl of frozen veggies and peanut sauce and call it dinner. I used to be seriously calorie/fats conscious and really worried about gaining weight. (I really wanted to get back to a weight that is roughly 60lbs less than I weigh now and the body I had at 15.) I would really limit what I ate. I might pair tofu, some slices of deli turkey, a hard boiled egg , or a string cheese for protein, but I was pretty harsh with myself, and looking back, pretty miserable. Now if I’m eating a bowl of veggies with peanut sauce and calling it dinner? It’s out of pure laziness or exhaustion and usually paired with chicken nuggets, or a whole sammich.
  3. Reach for my dark wash stretchy jeans when getting ready to go out. In college and right after I had some really great dark blue jeans that were my go-tos when getting ready for a night out. They were forgiving, matched everything, and bonus! they made me look thin and my butt look really good! Now, I still reach for my dark wash, stretchy jeans, but while they still match everything and make my butt look good, they’re also forgiving of spills and are really comfortable. Comfort and spill coverage wins.

I’m really lucky (and thankful) to be in a position in my life and heart where I can choose comfort over necessity – it hasn’t always been that way and I’m aware that it might not always be that way. I can only hope I’ve grown enough in the last 15 years that there are more comfortable days than not.

What do you do the same as you did before but for different reasons now?

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